Candy Crush Saga. What began as a cellphone game has become to the lives of many, including myself, an unstoppable addiction. The game is literally candy bejeweled but somehow eviler and full of cruel candy sweets out to ruin your productivity like nobody’s business. The sound effects in it and the music are terribly pleasing to listen to. Words like “Delicioussss.”, “Tasty!” and “Divineeeee” have become velvet to my ears. Here are the signs of addiction as per introspection.
1. You find yourself screaming at friends to “Give me lives! Give me lives fudge darn it!” Because you’ve used up your 5 lives and can’t wait 0.5 hours to gain a new one.
2. You become a candy crush “drug dealer” and start pushing the game onto others in your life, this may include boyfriends, co workers, friends. I have slowly surrounded myself with a horde of Candy Crushing zombies who also play it day and night just like me. My apologies?
3. You make weird noises in addiction to Candy Crush Saga’s own sound effects. Like when you make a Stripped Candy Bomb, well… um, you go ‘WHOOSH’ and ‘KA-BOOM’ and ‘WHOOSHKA-BOOM!’. And the faces you make during it are equally redundant.
4. You play a different game advertised by Candy Crush Saga in order to keep play Candy Crush Saga. I played half an hour of another game called Pet Rescue Saga, (saving innocent virtual pets from innocent virtual deaths) the game is literally Collapse/Bubble Pop but with cute animals on top? I played 8 levels of this just to get 5 lives for Candy Crush because I was out of lives. I let a game force me to play a totally different game in order to play that game!
5. You develop a six sense that is both useless and annoying. What is this six sense? It’s a Candy Crush six sense. I’ll get this weird jolt in my body and then a sudden and scary realization comes. Somebody somewhere nearby is playing Candy Crush. It will take me a second or two usually to realize the cause of this is because I am hearing the Candy Crush music playing somewhere in the distance. I have heard it at a Karate waiting lounge. I have heard it on the subway, I have heard it on the bus, and sometimes I even see people play it when walking by pedestrians on my way home. Is it a disturbing Baader Meinhof phenomenon or divine intervention?
6. Other people laugh at you because you are a loser who can not stop playing Candy Crush. They roll their eyes at you every time you become glued to you phone with the Candy Crush music eerily playing its hypnotic tune. So what do you do? You smite them with all your Candy Crushing smite and dare them to play one level of Candy Crush and then they become just like you. ADDICTED.